Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Top Ten Christmas Films - By The Writer

1. It’s A Wonderful Life (1946)
Come on, what else was it going to be?! It may be as predictable as your uncle telling an off-colour joke at Christmas dinner, but It’s A Wonderful Life is quite simply the best Christmas film ever made, quite simply because it’s the only one that’s good at any time of year. Take out the Bedford Falls snow and Christmassy-setting of the final scenes and this is an evergreen tale of one man’s personal struggles - and a bloody depressing one it is too. Sure, you may remember Frank Capra’s classic for it’s ‘every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings’ mantra, but deep down this is really a dark, depressing tale of an ambitious young man finding the hopes and expectations of his youth battered into submission by the Dickins-esque spectre of real life. No wonder the poor guy wanted to kill himself. Thankfully, guardian angel Clarence swoops down to remind Jimmy Stewart’s George Bailey that it is indeed a wonderful life and creates a beautiful finale into the bargain. I once saw this on the big screen in a packed auditorium a few weeks before the big day. If you get the opportunity to do the same take it. It’s one of the best cinematic experiences I have ever enjoyed.

2. Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)
Here’s another film that’s not just for Christmas. It is also regularly viewed at Halloween. Indeed, one of the finest pleasures of my youth was in seeing just how badly ITV would bugger up the scheduling of Nightmare Before Christmas (I was a very lonely child). Halloween? Christmas? Morning? ‘Noon? Night? They never got it right of course (they are ITV, after all), but it’s really not too difficult to work out. Despite its ghoulish stars and ‘Created by Tim Burton’ credit (Henry Selick, we should remember, is the man who toiled in the director’s chair), this is really all about Christmas and its heartwarming magic, as witnessed in Danny Elfman’s magnificent song ‘What’s This?’. “There's children throwing snowballs, instead of throwing heads. They're busy building toys and absolutely no-one’s dead.” Is it just us or is this the most weirdly perfect description of Christmas ever?

3. How The Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)
Here’s the story that inspired Burton’s Nightmare. Dr Seuss’ How The Grinch Stole Christmas is, of course, a classic in book form. However, in taking it to the animated arena, Looney Tunes legend Chuck Jones added something extra to it. Extending it slightly to fit 25 minutes, he and Seuss managed to craft a sweet but not sentimental tale of a grumpy green ghoul who attempts to ruin Christmas for all the innocent Whos in Whoville. Of course, he sees that Christmas “can’t be bought in a store” and that “maybe it means a little bit more”, but it’s Jones animation that shines just as much as the message. The whitish-blue snow, the primary colours of Whoville and the marvellous scene where the Grinch’s mouth spreads and spreads and spreads into the world’s wildest villainous smile make this a true classic.

4. Gremlins (1984)
Does this count? It’s not strictly a Christmas film, and even if it were, it’d be a damn nasty one, but therein lies the charm of Joe Dante’s demonic inversion of Wonderful Life. This is the anti-Christmas film, in which a load of nasty beasties run riot, the nice boy doesn’t get to keep the cute little critter at the end and his charmingly mad next door neighbour appears to die (he doesn‘t, but he is run over by a gremlin in a snow plough). Yet, despite this, it’s still chock full of ingenious comedy which adds levity to the anarchy. See, for example, the Gremlin being chucked in blender, the Gremlins hanging out in the bar, drinking smoking and flashing, and the evil Mrs Deagle riding her malfunctioning stairmaster out the window…Okay, maybe they’re not quite jolly little slices of silly comedy, but everyone needs a bit of cynicism at Christmas…and Dante delivers it in spades.

5. Die Hard (1988)
The best action film ever made is also one of the best Christmas films ever made. Sure, it may only be tenuously set at Christmas and, considering the events take place in LA, it’s a fairly sunny Christmas. However, the whole point of Christmas is to conquer work/the traffic/irritating relatives to get to the people you love. The only difference for Bruce Willis’s John McClane (still his best performance) is that he must stop an evil German terrorist and his gang of Teutonic henchmen from blowing up Nakatomi Plaza before he can get to the woman he loves. Cue big explosions, flying limbs and swear words galore. Yipee-kay-yay motherfudger!


6. A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)
As someone who grew up mostly watching the 1980s Charlie Brown Specials I was shocked to see how dark and neurotic the character was back in the 60s. Sure, when I was a kid he was a bit depressed, but back when he first made the jump from Charles Schultz’s comic strip to moving animation, he and Snoopy made Scrooge look like a happy little camper and had the evil angry eyes and growly voices to prove it. So why is this one in here if its so depressing? Well, while it is quite sad, its message (Christmas is about more than flashy trees and presents) is spot on and frankly there’s something classic, almost Norman Rockwell-esque, about the animation that screams Christmas. Come on, what would the yuletide be without the Peanuts gang skating on a frozen lake as the snow falls?

7. The Muppet’s Christmas Carol (1992)
This was only the second Muppets feature film to be released after the death of Jim Henson and it‘s one of the best. Christmas Carol remakes are ten a penny at this time of year, but Brian Henson’s version stays surprisingly close to the source to make for bizarrely one of the most faithful adaptations of any book ever. As if that isn’t enough, you also have the fact one of the greatest stories ever told is being played out…by Muppets. Kermit takes on Bob Cratchit, the Marleys are, of course, Statler and Waldorf and Charlie Dickens himself is played by none other than Gonzo. He should be flattered.

8. The Apartment (1960)
You’re going to have to bear with me on this one. Billy Wilder’s masterpiece The Apartment isn’t strictly a Christmas film. It takes place over the festive season and it’s big finale happens on New Year’s Eve, but it’s not technically a Christmas film. So, why is it here? Because I’m the one writing this list and you’re not, so sod off. The Apartment is my favourite film of all time, boasting one of Jack Lemmon’s best performances as the down-and-out Bud Baxter and one of the most well-rounded screen romances in the shape of his infatuation with Shirely McLaine’s Fran Kubelick, an elevator girl at Bud’s office who tries to kill herself when her own relationship goes down the pan. Not very Christmassy, you may think, but then there’s that New Year’s finale. Hearing that Bud has done the right thing and told the bosses who rent his apartment to have extra-marital affairs to go hang, Fran goes to find him just as he’s about to leave town. Do they get together? I won’t ruin it for you, but the answer includes the finest closing line since Wilder’s Some Like It Hot, so check it out.

9. Scrooged (1998)
Christmas is great. Bill Murray is great. Christmas plus Bill Murray is simply magnificent. Scrooged is arguably one of the most under-rated Christmas films ever. Directed by Harold Ramis before he and Murray found a bit of critical respectability with Groundhog Day, it’s a bitter and cynical reworking A Christmas Carol with Murray installed in the Scrooge role, re-imagined here as a heartless TV executive. It doesn’t scrimp on the horror, with the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future really quite nasty. However, the heart is still very much there and, simply because its Murray, it’s probably one of the funniest Christmas films ever made even if, as The Editor told me a few weeks back, it does get slightly less amusing with each viewing.

10. Elf (2005)
Here’s another festive treat that doesn’t really get the respect it deserves. Will Ferrell is a fine comic talent, but his wide-eyed naivety and aptitude for slapstick has only really been exploited fully in this tale of an human who was raised as an elf and finds himself thrust out into the real world in a bid to find his real father. Former Swinger Jon Favraeu makes an impressive directorial debut, showing all the zest and vigour he would later display in the also-underrated Zathura and will hopefully bring to next summer’s Iron Man, while the Christmas Eve-set finale is a heart-warmingly sweet moment that never descends into sentimentality. And as Zooey Deschanel dressed up as an elf? Well, I know what I want to find in my stocking on Christmas morn...

Top Ten Christmas Albums - By The Editor

1. A Christmas Present For You From Phil Spector (1963)
Phil Spector made so many incredible records in his time as the best pop producer in the world, but the best album he ever made was this one, which is also the best Christmas album of all time by a distance. Ironically, it wasn't a success at the time, with festive spirit rather sapped by it being released on the day of JFK's assassination, but it's grown in popularity ever since, and with so many definitive versions of Christmas classics by the likes of The Crystals and The Ronettes as well as the awesome Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) by Darlene Love, this is the best present anyone's ever given us.

2. A Charlie Brown Christmas - Vince Guaraldi (1965)
The Writer quite rightly cited the first Peanuts cartoon as one of the best Christmas films of all time, and the soundtrack from it is just as great. Vince Guaraldi's piano jazz music became synonymous with the Peanuts cartoons down the years and his Linus and Lucy theme is instantly recognisable, but the rest of the music here is just wonderful and smooth Christmas music. The opening song of the show, Christmastime Is Here is delightful and so are all of the tunes here that aren't even in the TV special (after all, this album is longer than that was)...

3. The McGarrigle Christmas Hour - Kate & Anna McGarrigle (2005)
The McGarrigle Hour was a landmark album for the Canadian folk sister act, bringing in their family and friends for an album that sounded like the best party you never got invited to, so it was only fitting that they should repeat the formula for a Christmas record. With family like Rufus and Martha Wainwright and friends like Teddy Thompson and Emmylou Harris, it's not difficult to see why this is such an awesome record, and the mixture of old Christmas tunes, new Christmas tunes and the vast array of talent make this a Christmas album for people who don't want to listen to Slade.

4. Barenaked For The Holidays - Barenaked Ladies (2004)
Not ones to just cash in on the festive spirit, Barenaked Ladies give value for money on their Christmas album with a collection of carols (all delivered in their trademark jokey way), festive favourites and original tracks. Being polite Canadian types, they also through in a few Hanukkah songs as well and it all makes for an album that is fun and intelligent and while at times it can get a little irritating, the positives outweight the negatives.

5. Songs for Christmas - Sufjan Stevens (2006)
When you get a Sufjan Stevens album, you know that you're going to get a lot for your money and you also know that it's going to take a while to really get into because it's so long. Clocking in at over two hours of material, Songs For Christmas is actually a compilation for a few different festive EPs recorded between 2001 and 2006, and features all the usual songs plus a whole load of original songs. It doesn't all work, but it's certainly the best album you can get for that indie kid.

6. Dig That Crazy Christmas - The Brian Setzer Orchestra (2005)
His second collection of Christmas tunes in three years, this is probably the best of Setzer's holiday albums, mainly because of the song choices. Jingle Bell Rock, Zat You Santa Claus? and Cool Yule all benefit from his big-band-meets-surf-rock style of music, while originals like Santa Drives A Hot Rod make this a very cool and very fun alternative at Christmas.

7. The Beach Boys' Christmas Album - The Beach Boys (1964)
A rather rushed cash-in album, this doesn't come close to standing up to the kind of music that the Beach Boys were making at this time,but there's enough great stuff here to make it worthwhile. The best part is the first half, with original tracks like Little Saint Nick, Santa's Beard and Merry Christmas Baby all having that Brian Wilson magic, and while the second half - arranged by Dick Reynolds and featuring carols and Xmas favourites - is a bit dreary, it's still a decent album altogether.

8. One More Drifter in the Snow - Aimee Mann (2006)
Aimee Mann and Christmas shouldn't really go together, but somehow this works. Perhaps it's because she was inspired to make it by A Charlie Brown Christmas, or perhaps it's just the sheer wonder of hearing her and Grant Lee Phillips sing You're A Mean One, Mr Grinch. But whatever it is, One More Drifter In The Snow manages to tread the line between depressing Christmas and merry Christmas well and with plenty of class.

9. Winter Carols - Blackmore's Night (2006)
Those who haven't heard Blackmore's Night before might be rather surprised if they get Winter Carols on the basis of Ritchie Blackmore's work with Deep Purple and Rainbow, because this is a world away from those rock bands. This group is basically a Rennaissance folk group (seriously) with Blackmore on acoustic guitar and Candice Night (get it?) on vocals. However, this works perfectly for a collection of carols and a couple of original tracks, as the music sounds like what Christmas music was before Wizzard or even Bing Crosby were around. Lord Of The Dance is never a good thing, but there's plenty of other good stuff to make up for it.

10. A Christmas Together - John Denver & The Muppets (1979)
I've changed this one since we posted the blog, mainly because A Christmas Together appeared on my iPod's shuffling about ten minutes later and reminded me why it should be in the list. It's from a TV special by country legend Denver and those crazy Muppets, where they sing a bunch of Christmas tunes together, making for a real contrast between his sweet vocals and some of the more 'colourful' singing voices of the various characters. Musically, it's sublime and the presence of the Muppets helps cut through the treacle to make it an album with heart and a sense of fun. Sorry Jethro Tull...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!